Helo.... i'm here post-anatomy exam feels better to have it off my shoulders... but man i just feel tired........ kinda worn out somehow.... sigh... i didn't do a late night or anything..but i did managed to finish almost an entire block of Whittakers Almond Gold.. in the process of preparing.. i hope that doesn't add on to my waistline anytime soon :p
Nothing much i guess just so much anatomy these days... had anatomy lab after the test n then having 2 more labs tomolo n 1 more the day after! O.o i feel kinda appalled just thinking about it... especially since its all related to sexual organ anatomy ..'cough cough'.... so yeah... i don't really feel very inclined to touch the prosections too much :p
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Sunday, May 29, 2005
The quiet before the storm...
Anatomy test is just a day away! mmm...... scary.... its the need to study coupled with the desire to just fool around.. sigh... its really bad to be feeling any sort of complacency at this period in time... I need a motivation booster!!
"Trust in the Lord with you heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make you paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
Saturday, May 28, 2005
$aTurd@y
Today is Saturday! The weekend at last.. can say i'm grateful but also can say i'm tired n i donno what i did with it.. my Sat is almost gone n i donno what productive thing i've done... arghhh... sometimes i'm too complacent for my own good ... Weekends tend to have the effect of killing most of my will to study n etc... plus i guess i'm kinda picky when studying.. need to be quiet n alone with everything at my fingertips..so i don't waste time hunting for notes or sthg .. sigh.....
but today Homegroup was fun.. hehe ... it was Ming's birthday n we had heaps of games n stuff.. mmmm... Its nice to just see everyone getting together n mingling n having fun :) although some of the things people do are a bit outrageous -- like tossing a person in the air? i'm glad i'm not the one being flipped :p
So yeah just praying for more concentration n motivation! And also a verse i read a couple of days back:
but today Homegroup was fun.. hehe ... it was Ming's birthday n we had heaps of games n stuff.. mmmm... Its nice to just see everyone getting together n mingling n having fun :) although some of the things people do are a bit outrageous -- like tossing a person in the air? i'm glad i'm not the one being flipped :p
So yeah just praying for more concentration n motivation! And also a verse i read a couple of days back:
"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind." James 1:5-6
Just reminded me of the need to trust n expect an answer when i pray coz God will answer!! Its just sometimes we forget about it or don't really care ..... And yeah i realised i have an answered prayer too :P didn't realise it was answered until i took a good look n thought oh yeah, it happened already........ hehehe
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Approaching test times :(
Yes.. its that time of the year again when suddenly all the tests start piling up on u ! Argh..... i have mid years in like 2 weeks +, anatomy next week and the usual 2 computer tests !!! How is it everything seems to pile on when u r busy but when u r free it just seems to free? Anyway due to my kinda lack of motivation to study n constant procrastination, I found this verse pretty inspiring :
:) hehe I know its a bit out of context since Paul was talking more about running the spiritual race but hey? It's like what i'm doing as well, i really need to get some focus and "beat my body and make it my slave" so that i won't be so lazy --- practice more self control n all :p It's kinda like saying u got to take control, get your act together and focus on what ur doing! So yeah ! Ganbatte!!
"Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after i have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize." 1 Corinthians 9:26-27
:) hehe I know its a bit out of context since Paul was talking more about running the spiritual race but hey? It's like what i'm doing as well, i really need to get some focus and "beat my body and make it my slave" so that i won't be so lazy --- practice more self control n all :p It's kinda like saying u got to take control, get your act together and focus on what ur doing! So yeah ! Ganbatte!!
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
8am lecture ...zZZZZ
Hello again... ! Today was ok .. had an 8 o'clock lecture today O.o It was sooooo early.. when i woke up.. it was still pitch black outside which was kinda freaky and made me wanna stay in bed all the more.. :p... but managed to drag myself out (being the "good" student) n left the flat just in time to catch some lovely pink and red streaks across the horizon.. pity i wasn't around to see the sunrise...
Today was mainly about schizophrenia, had a break from 10am - 2pm.. though.. u would think that they would swap the 8am lectures for a bit later.. instead of having such a big gap.. sigh.. but thats the problem with streaming.....Managed to discover for some odd reason our phone can't call 0900 numbers hehe -- yes i know its a pretty useless bit of info unless u wanna call 0900...
We had out last lecture about appetative behaviours which were basically sexual behaviours n eating..... discovered the term "diet-induced obesity" hehe..coz it seems in US like a lot of kids have started dieting since around 9-10 years old n apparently most obese ppl have had some run in with dieting be4 .. put 2 and 2 together... obesity occurs due to the dieting as ppl tend to fluctuate from losing weight then gaining heaps back n losing again.. In the end the more u diet the better the body adapts at storing energy and therefore it stores more when u eat n thus u get fatter n fatter eventhough u eat less or the same amount --- interesting theory aye? hehe makes me think twice before considering dieting :p
Today was mainly about schizophrenia, had a break from 10am - 2pm.. though.. u would think that they would swap the 8am lectures for a bit later.. instead of having such a big gap.. sigh.. but thats the problem with streaming.....Managed to discover for some odd reason our phone can't call 0900 numbers hehe -- yes i know its a pretty useless bit of info unless u wanna call 0900...
We had out last lecture about appetative behaviours which were basically sexual behaviours n eating..... discovered the term "diet-induced obesity" hehe..coz it seems in US like a lot of kids have started dieting since around 9-10 years old n apparently most obese ppl have had some run in with dieting be4 .. put 2 and 2 together... obesity occurs due to the dieting as ppl tend to fluctuate from losing weight then gaining heaps back n losing again.. In the end the more u diet the better the body adapts at storing energy and therefore it stores more when u eat n thus u get fatter n fatter eventhough u eat less or the same amount --- interesting theory aye? hehe makes me think twice before considering dieting :p
Sunday, May 22, 2005
Friday, May 20, 2005
"Eye" Day!
Yay ! its finally friday .. its the real thing too! Today had a bit of a late start at 11am.. but u know what? i kinda misread the timetable or sthg and assumed that i started at 10am and so woke up at 9+ and actually got all ready n walked like 20 steps from my flat be4 realising that something wasn't right n i actually checked my timetable... only to realise that i was 1 hour early >.< so decided to just go back :p --- mind u it was pretty cold and all so my flat seemed like a nice warm place.. since i was only a few seconds away :)
Had mainly an "eye" day..had like workshop on vision.. n was looking at bits of anatomy n blindness n looking inside an eye n stuff like that... One really funny slide our lecturer showed us was an eye of a person who had had eye surgery to replace the lens .. n the thing was u could see hte lens when u looked at the eye coz it had been mistakenly placed on the outside of the iris instead of behind it! So the person just wouldn't be able to see anything.. it was really funny sort off :P can't imagine wat the surgeon was thinking ... hehe.. When i think of it eye surgery is pretty delicate n quite scary since u gotta cut all properly n the eye is only that big ! mmmm donno how the surgeons can make all those neat little incisions to like cut out the cornea lift it up n take out the lens inside n then sew it back up again! its just miniscule!
After dinner watched part of Pacifier with my flatmates was kinda fun.. but had to leave half way coz of a meeting :'( which i arrived on time ! but only started like wat 1/2 - 3/4 of an hour late!!! Argghhhhhh Malaysian timing..
Anyway as always hoping for a relaxing weekend .. that doesn't pass by too fast so that i can actually know it happened and enjoy the rest coz my days are not getting any freer --- the downsides of med school.... ( as i'm sure Ruth is very much aware of :p)
Had mainly an "eye" day..had like workshop on vision.. n was looking at bits of anatomy n blindness n looking inside an eye n stuff like that... One really funny slide our lecturer showed us was an eye of a person who had had eye surgery to replace the lens .. n the thing was u could see hte lens when u looked at the eye coz it had been mistakenly placed on the outside of the iris instead of behind it! So the person just wouldn't be able to see anything.. it was really funny sort off :P can't imagine wat the surgeon was thinking ... hehe.. When i think of it eye surgery is pretty delicate n quite scary since u gotta cut all properly n the eye is only that big ! mmmm donno how the surgeons can make all those neat little incisions to like cut out the cornea lift it up n take out the lens inside n then sew it back up again! its just miniscule!
After dinner watched part of Pacifier with my flatmates was kinda fun.. but had to leave half way coz of a meeting :'( which i arrived on time ! but only started like wat 1/2 - 3/4 of an hour late!!! Argghhhhhh Malaysian timing..
Anyway as always hoping for a relaxing weekend .. that doesn't pass by too fast so that i can actually know it happened and enjoy the rest coz my days are not getting any freer --- the downsides of med school.... ( as i'm sure Ruth is very much aware of :p)
Thursday, May 19, 2005
Feels like FrIdAy already...
Ahh... it really feels like friday sad to say its just a trick my mind is playing on me and its actually thursday :p Today had a really early 9am lecture on pharmacology.. have to say that my brain was a bit dead n it didn't help to be sitting near the front of the class argh.... wats with all the streptokinase, tPA, clopidogrel and neuroprotective factors.. n wat not... i can't really remember how everything works anymore... O.o
After that had a visit to Leslie Groves up at Wakari. Quite nice i'd say.. i liked it better then the last time we went there :) Mainly just meeting some patients and talking and doing a full cranial nerve examination .. ehhe.. Afternoon had a system's integration case.. which involved some aspiring med 3 student walking around with a flashlight meeting some hypoglycaemic person or sthg.. n yeah..doing a check on pupillary dilation reflexes! hehe.. .. wonder how many ppl carry a flashlight around...
The day was ok i guess just wished that today was friday though.. i think i start a bit later tomolo hehe.. so can get a bit more sleep mmmm......
After that had a visit to Leslie Groves up at Wakari. Quite nice i'd say.. i liked it better then the last time we went there :) Mainly just meeting some patients and talking and doing a full cranial nerve examination .. ehhe.. Afternoon had a system's integration case.. which involved some aspiring med 3 student walking around with a flashlight meeting some hypoglycaemic person or sthg.. n yeah..doing a check on pupillary dilation reflexes! hehe.. .. wonder how many ppl carry a flashlight around...
The day was ok i guess just wished that today was friday though.. i think i start a bit later tomolo hehe.. so can get a bit more sleep mmmm......
WeDnEsdAy
helo...
haven't been updating for a pretty long time n i know it.. i guesss sometimes just can't be bothered to log in and also the bad weather is really impinging on my internet!! It just goes down sometimes its just so annoying having to restart n do this n that arghhhh.... plus its been freezing cold..the flat is like a fridge.... but prob still warmer than outside .. :p n my room is my refuge.. mmmmm
haven't been studying much lately n just realized that i have an anatomy spot test in like 2 weeks n mid years in like 1mth... :-S ... i donno how i'm gonna survive.. esp with all the little computer tests laced in between....... mmmmmm... i really need to get serious about studying... and B&B 5 test this week looks real tough...
Oh well... things life just doesn't get any easier....
haven't been updating for a pretty long time n i know it.. i guesss sometimes just can't be bothered to log in and also the bad weather is really impinging on my internet!! It just goes down sometimes its just so annoying having to restart n do this n that arghhhh.... plus its been freezing cold..the flat is like a fridge.... but prob still warmer than outside .. :p n my room is my refuge.. mmmmm
haven't been studying much lately n just realized that i have an anatomy spot test in like 2 weeks n mid years in like 1mth... :-S ... i donno how i'm gonna survive.. esp with all the little computer tests laced in between....... mmmmmm... i really need to get serious about studying... and B&B 5 test this week looks real tough...
Oh well... things life just doesn't get any easier....
Saturday, May 14, 2005
Poor mousey....
You know what? My mouse has died... it was working ok at first n then the red light started to blink.. and then it alternated between working and not working.. finally after a couple of days of tweaking it finally coughed, sputtered and gave up its ghost !!! NOOOoooo.... ---- By the way this is my USB computer mouse :'(
I hate not having a mouse around....
I hate not having a mouse around....
Friday, May 13, 2005
Weekend....
Hmmm ... the day has been ok .. quite free.. ended up with like only 2 hours of lectures :p.. but all at really odd times like 11-12pm and 2-3pm... so yeah.. hehe..... can't say much for my weekend.... but the week has been reasonably good and i'm getting a pre-weekend bout of laziness.. my anime collection is nicely expanding :p.. Currently going for DNAngel and Tactics :) hehe... have some Mai Hime, AIR and Final Approach too.. although the thing is i haven't really watched most of them.. hehe they're just accumulating themselves :p...
oh well.. hope to have a good weekend and to keep more in focus lor.. with studies and with God too. And good weather would be a nice change :)
oh well.. hope to have a good weekend and to keep more in focus lor.. with studies and with God too. And good weather would be a nice change :)
"It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man." Psalm 118:8
Thursday, May 12, 2005
Alone.....
Sometimes i wonder what it means to be alone? Sometimes you just stand in a crowded room n everyone rushes past.. the world is spinning with colours and activity and yet you are not moving. You are alive, you're breathing and yet you feel detached. In this world full of lights n sounds it is like a bystander taking a peek through a glass window , to the other side. You are so close yet so far- separated by an unseen barrier. It is like the air that you cannot see but you feel it and you know its there because your very existence is proof of that. But the loneliness is hampering... the buzz of life is muted and distorted into a big blur as it just whizzes past. Time does not wait for you. If you fall in this big bad world, you pick yourself up. If you do not u are left behind in the mad rush to go forward--- forward where? no one knows... even if the future is a big unknown we still rush blindly into it hoping for something better because it just can't get any worse, or can it? Maybe somehwere we condition ourselves to the world. To just accept and adapt as best as we can. Like how Pavlov conditioned his dogs to consider painful stimuli as pleasure. Its just a matter of conditioning... and practice..... conforming or maybe adaptation sounds much better?
It's like survival of the fittest. You never knew how dark and lonely it was out there until you stepped out of the comforting reccesses of your home. And yet is anyone ever truly alone? Because there will always be someone waiting for you, even if you do not know it, family, friends... I think thats where God comes in too... Because somewhere I remember He promises "..And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."(Matthew 28:20) Also "Come near to God and he will come near to you." (James 4:8) Thus i can infer that He is there for us always but in order to get comfort we need to draw near to Him too. Its a 2-way thing... loneliness maybe is just a state of mind...coz how can a person be truly lonely unless they choose to isolate themselves? .... and maybe i think too much................ ---- can't help it if i like complicating the little things of life :p
It's like survival of the fittest. You never knew how dark and lonely it was out there until you stepped out of the comforting reccesses of your home. And yet is anyone ever truly alone? Because there will always be someone waiting for you, even if you do not know it, family, friends... I think thats where God comes in too... Because somewhere I remember He promises "..And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."(Matthew 28:20) Also "Come near to God and he will come near to you." (James 4:8) Thus i can infer that He is there for us always but in order to get comfort we need to draw near to Him too. Its a 2-way thing... loneliness maybe is just a state of mind...coz how can a person be truly lonely unless they choose to isolate themselves? .... and maybe i think too much................ ---- can't help it if i like complicating the little things of life :p
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Soooo tired....
Yay! I'm updating again..... (i'm surprised too :p ) probably coz i'm feeling quite perky now since i managed to do my computer test n pass it ..coz i was kinda busy last night..had a flatmates VERY "belated" birthday --- as in like 3 mths late? hehe... and man it was so funny.. like she kept saying "I'm confused!" coz some of her friends sneaked into our flat n all n were trying to play a little trick on her. Ahh.. i have some pics too..hmmm.. where should i put them?
Hehe... anyway i think i'm pretty exhausted.. but happily exhausted :p.. hehe... coz i had to study for the test last night.. n ended sleeping real late..coz i realised at like 12am or sthg that i hadn't finished studying!!.. i tend to get distracted easily -_- hai hai... such a bad habit...
To top it up, today was a pretty long n boring day too. For one things its 9am-4pm. ... n the computer test is at 4.15pm... We had a patient talk to us about suicide which i found really really touching. Its amazing how common suicide is in NZ apparently like youth suicide is among the highest in the world!!! Why that is so is not really known.. but it has been attributed to like social isolation(NZ is quite rural :p), lack of support, the lattitude? ( winter blues ~~) n i wonder if maybe just sheer boredom from a lack of nothing better to do .. hehe... And one very interesting point was that sometimes people don't really wanna die.. its just that at that point in time they just lost all reasonable thought. So I guess this suggests like depression or some psychiatric disorder. And its just the times when people just briefly get to drowned in their grief n depression that they don't care about anything else -- family, consequences etc. And also men have higher rates of "successful" suicides then women... n they are also incidents of parasuicide where the person doesn't really wanna die but just wants to attract attention or ask for help... like swallowing 30 paracetamol n then calling someone up...Bizarre in a way though i think..coz its a pretty high risk way to get attention n wat if something backfires? hmmmm.. But i guess it was very enlightening n though i don't really like the idea i guess sometimes people just aren't in a proper state of mind when they do it.. so its unlikely that a proper rational person would do it. I guess the human mind is just tooo complicated :p
Hehe... anyway i think i'm pretty exhausted.. but happily exhausted :p.. hehe... coz i had to study for the test last night.. n ended sleeping real late..coz i realised at like 12am or sthg that i hadn't finished studying!!.. i tend to get distracted easily -_- hai hai... such a bad habit...
To top it up, today was a pretty long n boring day too. For one things its 9am-4pm. ... n the computer test is at 4.15pm... We had a patient talk to us about suicide which i found really really touching. Its amazing how common suicide is in NZ apparently like youth suicide is among the highest in the world!!! Why that is so is not really known.. but it has been attributed to like social isolation(NZ is quite rural :p), lack of support, the lattitude? ( winter blues ~~) n i wonder if maybe just sheer boredom from a lack of nothing better to do .. hehe... And one very interesting point was that sometimes people don't really wanna die.. its just that at that point in time they just lost all reasonable thought. So I guess this suggests like depression or some psychiatric disorder. And its just the times when people just briefly get to drowned in their grief n depression that they don't care about anything else -- family, consequences etc. And also men have higher rates of "successful" suicides then women... n they are also incidents of parasuicide where the person doesn't really wanna die but just wants to attract attention or ask for help... like swallowing 30 paracetamol n then calling someone up...Bizarre in a way though i think..coz its a pretty high risk way to get attention n wat if something backfires? hmmmm.. But i guess it was very enlightening n though i don't really like the idea i guess sometimes people just aren't in a proper state of mind when they do it.. so its unlikely that a proper rational person would do it. I guess the human mind is just tooo complicated :p
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
Early week...
Ok .. just a quick lunch time-y type drop in.. hehe just wanted to check out hte blog n lo n behold there are msges ! :p. hehe... thanx angela... Had a pretty free day today... only one lecture at 9am... n guess wat it was.... abt... --- normal sexual function -_- I don't feel so good after listening to some pretty dodgy stuff.. ( to me anyway..) so early in the morning... i think my brain was like going eek!! --let's not go into details now.... :p
Other than that its ok .. the weather is looking up! hehe... n also did i mention that i tried some Lindt chocs the other day? they were on sale at COuntdown.. I have to say they were fabulous.. totally sooooo yummmy!! Lindt is the best !! Although it was pretty expensive lor.. even if it was on sale :p...
anyway... better get a move one... not a good thing to spend my day staring at the computer screen... ciao!
Other than that its ok .. the weather is looking up! hehe... n also did i mention that i tried some Lindt chocs the other day? they were on sale at COuntdown.. I have to say they were fabulous.. totally sooooo yummmy!! Lindt is the best !! Although it was pretty expensive lor.. even if it was on sale :p...
anyway... better get a move one... not a good thing to spend my day staring at the computer screen... ciao!
Sunday, May 08, 2005
Happy Mother's Day!
Today's mother's day! hehe .. not that i have much to say about that hmmm.... coz my mum's not here :( But i hope she has a great Mother's day anyway. Today is the start of a new week..... --- its really amazing how my weekend disppeared in the flash of an eye!! :'( I made pancakes on Saturday morning for lunch/breakfast! It was kinda fun.. n a bit unusual since having pancakes with ice cream n yogurt n fruits gives my stomach this weird cold feeling! But i've just discovered how amazingly easy they are to make!! Only like 4 ingredients.. never knew that hehe...
The weather hasn't been much good lately.. which is kinda bad.. coz i can't do my laundry... don't wanna move out of my nice room :p... n no way am i gonna open the windows ...!! Although as with the onset of cold weather my window does its usual fogging up --- drip drip!.... So annoying...i can't put anything next to the window now coz it just gets soaked .. esp paper ;) n i think it promotes some moldy stuff too... hehe.....wat can i say winter is coming -- blame it on the season and hope for many more sunny days to come...
The weather hasn't been much good lately.. which is kinda bad.. coz i can't do my laundry... don't wanna move out of my nice room :p... n no way am i gonna open the windows ...!! Although as with the onset of cold weather my window does its usual fogging up --- drip drip!.... So annoying...i can't put anything next to the window now coz it just gets soaked .. esp paper ;) n i think it promotes some moldy stuff too... hehe.....wat can i say winter is coming -- blame it on the season and hope for many more sunny days to come...
Monday, May 02, 2005
Sunday, May 01, 2005
Perfect balance!
HeY! We're in perfect balance! ;-) hehe just a little pic update for some pics taken during the picnic at Woodhough Gardens ( is that how u spell it? :p) Links on the side -- Gallery 2.... Gonna be starting school tomolo !!! :( there goes my 2 week holidays.... although it was heaps of fun . .. n just to relax n get myself sorted out ...
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